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I would like to ask a questions, but I didn't know where to go and fill out
the question thing. Anyways, my question is ok: I'm losing my virginity
with this I really love and I know I may not do it good, but it is normal to
be all wet when your having sex? And do the guy's get wet in any way? I
know I don't really know about this cause I really never pay attention or I
was planning to be with my husband when I got married. Anyways, thank you
for answering my questions, and I need to know more about this cause I
really don't know anything when it comes to this. =) I really would like to
know what happens after you been with a man and how does your body change?
Can you send me information about this, cause I really don't want to have
any kids at this time, but I know it takes once just to get pregnant, and
I'm really scared to get pregnant right now.
Thank you so much =)
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Answer:
by Konstance McCaffree: ()
You really are smart to be concerned about what might happen, since you certainly can get pregnant the very first time you have intercourse. And since he has had three prior sexual partners, he may have been exposed to sexually transmitted infections that he doesn't even know he has. They are often hidden and symptoms don't appear.
Let me take your questions in order. Yes, it is really very normal for the female to be wet when you are aroused during sex play. The walls of the vagina get very wet and it begins to push its way out to help lubricate for when the penis goes into the vagina. The man doesn't get wet because the arousal is causing his penis to get large and hard. The blood flow into the penis when he is sexually turned on, is a parallel action to the blood flow into the walls of the vagina and the clitoris in the female. If that isn't clear, write back and ask me more about it.
Even if you were planning on having intercourse first with your husband, you still have things to learn about your own body and that of your partner. You'd still need to know the things you are asking about. No one just knows how to enjoy sexual pleasuring. It is something we all need to learn. It is good to learn it with the partner because every person is different. Your boyfriend can tell you what he enjoys and show you what you need to do to give him pleasure. Hopefully, he will do the same to you and not assume you are just like the other women he has had sex with.
After having intercourse (there are many other ways that don't involve intercourse that people do to arouse one another and involve in sex play. Most can have orgasms without ever having intercourse, which is why I keep specifying which act we are talking about)
There isn't much of a body change (except if you were to get pregnant). The hymen which is a thin tissue is moved outwardly by the presence of the penis. It actually can be moved before that if the couple has been enjoying fingering with several fingers. The only thing that really ever changes a person's body much is delivering a baby vaginally. Then the internal organs are moved and muscles are stretched some. Just having intercourse really doesn't do much.
As for being safe from pregnancy and diseases, you really need to be using two methods of contraception. You should not have any contact with his semen or even the penis touch your external genitals without a latex condom. It is the only real barrier to disease transmission. It also helps against pregnancy. If you want to be very certain that a pregnancy doesn't occur you then need to use one of the other methods, such as the Pill or other hormonal methods or a diaphram. You also are in need of a pelvic exam by a gynecologist. Once a young woman reaches 18, or begins having sex play that involves the vagina she needs to get this type of check up. You need to know that you are healthy and your body is ready for intercourse. I suggest that you do this in preparation for your first intercourse whether it be now or a little later. You can also ask the doctor about questions that you have. Feel free to write back and ask us more questions as well.
Reviewed by: Patricia Fawver Ph.D. in Sexology
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