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Question:
I have suffered from ejaculatory retardation for my entire
adult life, beginning with my first attempt at sex with the
another person. I can't begin to tell you the anxiety this has
caused both me and the women I've loved in the course of my
life. I've been married for 27 years to a wonderful woman and
in the past few years my problem has lessened. I can ejaculate
- sometimes - but only after long, long intercourse. I can
masturbate and come fairly easily, but my wife can't bring me
to orgasm with her hand or mouth no matter how long she
works on me. Viagra (which I can't afford to use on a regular
basis) keeps me erect so that I do reach orgasm more
frequently, but it still takes a long time. After a certain point,
the act changes from a pleasurable activity, to just hard work -
which is no fun for either of us.
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Answer:
by : (05/13/2004)
Situational retarded ejaculation often presents as a
treatment challenge, especially if it becomes a long term
problem. From the complicated and fairly detailed history you
shared in your email, I would suggest finding an experienced
sex therapist, who is also tuned in to dealing with the issues of
guilt and couple frustration. Consultation with a urologist may
help, as certain medications may assist in promoting
ejaculation. However, long term help will most likely require
the assistance of a specialized therapist. Consult the American
Association of Sex Educators Counselors and Therapists for a
certified sex therapists in your area.Reviewed by Sexual Health Editorial Team
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