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Question:
my boyfriend and i had unprotected sex but he didn't penetrate me all the way. i'm fearful that i might be pregnant. we've had great communication about that issue but i'm afraid to ask about birth control since it might show up on my medical records and my parents don't know about him yet. how soon can i find out and what can i do about it if i test positive?
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Answer:
by Georgan Gregg: (06/14/2004)
I’m glad to hear that you communicate well with your boyfriend because that’s exactly what’s called for now. Sounds as if you want medical advice but are unsure whether your parents can find out about such inquiries. Of course, talking with one or both of your (or his) parents would be ideal, but only you know about your relationship with them. If you think there’s even a chance they would be supportive it’s worth a try by saying something like: “If I ever need birth control advice, where do you think I should go?” Their reaction could offer a lead-in if you feel you can proceed.
If you feel you must continue on your own, there are free or low cost clinics available. The 2 of you need to talk with the clinics by phone first to find out their confidentiality policy. Frankly, unless you file insurance that your parents pay for, they should have no way to know. Look in the yellow pages, then phone & ask lots of questions before going in - to be sure that you qualify. If you’re a college student, many student health organizations have exactly the services you’re looking for.
You can only know if you are pregnant by taking a pregnancy test. Tests are sold over the counter, but a clinic or doctor does the most reliable test. If you are pregnant, finding out as early as possible will help you & your boyfriend decide whom to talk to next. The clinics should have counselors who can talk to you about options. If you are pregnant it’s especially important that you try to communicate with your parents. And if you aren’t it’s important that you decide how to proceed responsibly with your sexuality.
Contacting us was a great start, whatever happens from this point forward. I recommend 2 books by The Boston Women’s Health Collective: "Our Bodies, Ourselves For The New Century," by & for women about health & sexuality, &, "Changing Bodies, Changing Lives," about young adult sex & relationships.
This is an important time in your lives for thoughtful communication. Let us know if we can be of further help.
Reviewed by Sexual Health Editorial Team
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