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Question:
I ejaculate during intercourse, but not when materbating. How can I produce an organsim during masterbation? Would you recommend a sex therapist?
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Answer:
by Linda Mona: (05/19/2004)
Hi Jack!
From your question, i am a bit unclear about whether you are having problems with orgasms or ejaculation during sex. A man can experience an orgasm without an ejaculation. However, sounds like whatever is working for you works with intercourse but not with masturabtion.
If i were you, I would try experimenting with a few things. Try masturbating alone and then masturabte with your partner helping out. See if the presence of having another person makes a difference in your ability to enjoy yourself and reach ejaculation.
Start paying attention to your thoughts and feelings when you are having intercourse. Then, do the same thing during masturabtion. Try and see if you mind seems to wander more or if for some reason you are not able to stay focused on your arousal when you are masturbating. This may help you in gathering information about stresses or anxiety that may be entering into your mind during masturbation.
Try these experiences. If you notice that you're thinking tends to wander, try and relax more during masturbation. Do it when you have a lot of free time, when you feel comfortable, etc.
If you feel that you can not get to the bottom of this on your own, a sex therapist may be able to help tease out what is going on in a more systematic way.
Good luck!
Dr. MonaReviewed by: Patricia Fawver Ph.D. in Sexology
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