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Question:
I have been trying to have intercouse with my boyfriend for the last six months. We are having a size problem, I guess you would call it. We have tried different positions, lubricants and everything else. Nothing seems to work. This is very frustrating to both of us. The relationship is suffering because of this. Can you please give me some advice.
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Answer:
by Mitchell Tepper: (06/05/2004)
Hi, Sorry for the delay. I put up a new version of the site and got swamped. Just want to make sure I have the facts right. You are a woman with SCI and intercourse is difficult/impossible because of your partner's size. This is situational, as you have had intercourse successfully with at least one other partner who was not as large. Is this correct? What's happening? Do you have sensation? How does the genital stimulation feel? In general, what effect has your SCI had on lubrication and your sense of arousal? Do mental mesages get translated to your genital response? Does the size of his penis make you more nervous or excited? Have you tried a lot of manual stimulation before hand with him progressively inserting more fingers as you warm up? Are you having vaginal spasms or are your musscles just not relaxing enough with stimulation to accomodate his size? These answers should help tease out wether this is something strictly anotomical, SCI related, or psychologicaly influenced.Reviewed by Sexual Health Editorial Team
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