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Better Sex

Meet the Experts

Mitchell Tepper has answered 51 questions.

  • I am involved intimately, but not to the point of intercourse w/ a 62-year-old man (I'm 62 also) He has never been married, but has had many sexual affairs. He is healthy; a self-employed

  • I can't use my arms to position myself, so I feel locked into a very passive role. I hate asking my partner to make all the moves. How can I become more active in the relationship myself?

  • The brain may be the most important sexual organ, but sometimes insertion is nice as well. What do you suggest for people who don't have, or can't sustain, erections?

  • If I'm totally frank about what works for me, it involves asking my partner to do things for me that are normally performed by an attendant. I feel I'm imposing.

  • My girlfriend--who is paraplegic--and I would like to try anal sex, but aren't sure if it will cause a bowel accident or whether it is safe for her because of her limited

  • When I meet new people, there is the presumption that "people in wheelchairs don't do sex." How do I communicate my interests without getting busted for harassment?

  • Am I Missing Something?

  • What is a good source for researching sexual positions for lovemaking between two disabled individuals--say two quads who function as high paras? I've read Enabling Romance and Sexual Options fo

  • Divorce and Disability Are there any studies on divorce among couples in which one person has a disability? What's the main reason for divorce? Does sexual dysfunction play a role? Do people with

  • I am a 35-year-old male C6-7 quad (13 years), and started taking Baclofen four years ago for spasms. Before that, I had a healthy sex drive. Now my sex drive is none. I have an understanding wit

  • It seems that the majority of romantic relationships begin with physical attraction between two people. As a 25-year-old C4-5 quad in graduate school, it is difficult for me to get women to see

  • I have been a T8 para for three years, and have begun a relationship that includes sex. I know I can get pregnant, but I don't know the best way to prevent it. Are there any birth control method

  • I am a C 5-7 quad. Before my injury, my boyfriend frequently performed oral sex on me, which I enjoyed. Since my injury, we have not had oral sex because I am afraid of incontinence and am not s

  • Wife and Caregiver I am a 44-year-old man with multiple sclerosis and have two PCAs. My wife says she wants to start doing my personal care to save money, but I am worried that if s

  • Awkward and Painful My partner wants me to perform oral sex on him and I am finding this difficult. I am a C4 quad without much trunk stability or strength in my arms so it is easie

  • Losing Interest I've heard that before you have sex with someone after spinal cord injury it is best to masturbate first to find out what feels good. Well I've tried and I'm not getting

  • Full Disclosure A woman I recently started dating has expressed an interest in being sexual with me. I have had very few sexual encounters since my disability and don't know how to tell

  • True Connoisseur-ship I am a male C5 quad with limited post-injury experience who loves to satisfy a woman orally. Having said that, I am curious about whether to stick to oral stimulati

  • Sex has become close to non-existent due to my wife's chronic pain associated with fibromyalgia. What suggestions do you have for us?

  • I am a 52-year-old woman with multiple sclerosis. Before the onset of MS five years ago, my husband and I made love about once a week and I always had an orgasm. But the more disabled I get the

  • What Is a Sexual Surrogate?

  • I have been a T12 para for only three months and have yet to get an erection. Can I achieve this with a vibrator? I¹ve read about a Ferti Care vibrator that claims to be for this exclusive use.

  • I am a C6-7 incomplete quad with pretty good sensation and no trouble getting erections. The problem is, I can only ejaculate for about two days in a row, sometimes three. Then I mus

  • I am an incomplete C5-6 quad, 26, male, injured nine years. I have no problem getting or maintaining an erection, with little or no stimulation, but the problem is that during interc

  • I'm a quadriplegic, 24-year-old male and have never had sex. I get erections all the time but cannot relieve them myself because of my disability. They are getting longer, more frequ

  • A small study reported by New Mobility in Feb 1999 suggested that Viagra might enhance sexual arousal in women with spinal cord injury. Anything new on that subject?

  • I have been a T12 para for only three months and have yet to get an erection. Can I achieve this with a vibrator? I¹ve read about a Ferti Care vibrator that claims to be for this exclusive use.

  • I LIVE IN SOUTH AFRICA. HOW CAN I ORDER A FERTI CARE VIBRATOR. I CANT SEEM TO FIND ANY ORDER ADRESS OR CONTACT NO OR WEB SITE OR E MAIL ADRESS. CAN YOU HELP PLEASE

  • I found a Video that my husband made of himself. The contents were of him pleasuring himself anally with purpose built toys or objects from around the home. When I confronted him with what I had foun

  • Hey who are you doing? I have a problem with my boyfriend because he's wanting to have sex a lot (he said he's addicted to it) and I don't want to have sex right now, even though I am very much at

  • i only have a short penis and well it bugs me to see other guys with bigger penises i am only 17 yet i feel that i am not the same as all my friends. Is there a average penis lenght and when dose your

  • What is the range of values of plmasa free testrone?

  • I would like to know the easiest positions for a man with emphysema to have sexual relations without getting too out of breath,he would like to have sex but gets too winded..its been3plus years and it

  • What is female ejaculation and how does it happen? Where does the "squirted" fluid come from? Is this fluid urine or a very watery version of a women's lubrication?

  • I am a 15 year old male, and this is the only place I have found that can answer questions. When I have an erection, it goes directly up, and almost hits my stomach. And as I am currently becoming sex

  • This past (December '99)I had a Turp, and this past February 2000 I had a penile implant and since then I have lost all feeling in my glans. I am unable to stimulate myself to orgasm. If I could I u

  • Is it safe to receive oral sex from an escort/prostitute as long as I wear a condom?

  • I DON'T FEEL SEXUAL DESIRE TOWARDS MY BOYFRIEND.

  • I have been trying to have intercouse with my boyfriend for the last six months. We are having a size problem, I guess you would call it. We have tried different positions, lubricants and everything

  • My partner had an orgasm without having his genital area touched at all. There was sexual tension, a message, and nibbling on his ear, and he orgasmed after about 3 hours of preparing for me giving h

  • I had an hernia operation when I was 12. When I recovered, I wanted to take a shower and sa that I have only one testicle left. This was like a shock for me, I never asked my mother why do I had only

  • This is my question: Can a man feel when he "comes" during intercourse? I mean can he feel it?

  • I've been married for 13 years, and have always had incredible sex with my husband. For about 3 months now though, I've noticed pain around my clitoris during my orgasm. My ob/gyn examined me, and f

  • I am a 33 year old female with a decreased sexual drive. I am interested in finding a natural remedy with herbs or vitamins that will increase my sexual desire. Can you recommend any product or prod

  • I am 16 and I have never had an orgasm. About a year ago, I started taking the antidepressant Paxil. After about 6 months of taking this, I stopped feeling the sensations of getting aroused. I still

  • I think I have experienced orgasms in my sleep (4 of them over the last 2 years) Is this possible?

  • Dear Mitch,
    I'm 31, reasonably fit, with no illness/disability or medication. I'm a non smoker and very light drinker. I suffer from taking too long to orgasm with a partner.

    My first sexua

  • I have always had a srong reaction to the sound of the trumpet, and especially the trombone. There is something about the both the shape, appearnce, and sound of those insrtuments that initiate an al

  • Why can't I have an orgasm in any position other than me on top AND why does it take so long? I have been married 24 years and he is the only one I have had sex with all my life. We have tried every

  • I'm 36, a C2 - C3 quad for the last 15 years. In that time, I've never had a relationship. I feel so incredibly sexually frustrated I can hardly stand it anymore. I would like to meet a woman but I

  • My fiance is a paraplegic. He has a c-7 spinal cord injury. We both want children, but we aren't sure if he can have children. I wanted to know if there is anyway to find out if he is able to conceive

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