Expert Answers Factual Answers to Your Sexual Health Questions

Expert Q & A Answers About

I can’t use my arms...how can I become more active in sexual positioning?

I can't use my arms to position myself because of my disability, so I feel locked into a very passive role. I hate asking my partner to make all the moves. How can I become more active in the relationship myself?

My partner’s spinal chord injury makes me feel self-conscious...what are some ways we can bring equal pleasure into the bedroom?

I'm very attracted to a man with a spinal cord injury, but when we've tried to be intimate, I find that I'm very self-conscious because the focus is more on my pleasure than his. I'm used to there being an obvious sign of a man's arousal (erection) and I feel awkward being the only one who appears to be aroused.

I can’t lift my legs...what are some different ways my husband and I can increase our pleasure?

I have multiple sclerosis and use a walker. I cannot lift my legs over or behind my husband when in the missionary position, and this limits my pleasure. How can I accommodate my husband and increase our pleasure?

My husband has cerebral palsy...will we be able to have a baby?

I'm a 24-year-old woman who’s married to a 23-year-old male wheelchair user who has cerebral palsy. Is there any reason why he wouldn’t be able to impregnate me? He has complete sexual function and we have a normal sex life.

Is lack of genital sensation common for people with cerebral palsy?

I’m 34, and I’ve had cerebral palsy since birth. Recently, my interest in sex has piqued and I have had several encounters in recent months ⎼ some of them being intercourse and some not. My question refers to my seeming lack of sensation in my genitals. Is this common with CP?

How can I enjoy sexual activity with my motor-nerve disease?

I have a motor-nerve disease. It causes spasticity in my legs and hands, and it makes sex too labor intensive to enjoy. Do you know of anything that might help?

What do I need to know before dating someone with cerebral palsy?

I am an able-bodied gay man interested in dating a man with mild cerebral palsy (he uses canes to walk). But I’m a little nervous about becoming involved with him. I'm afraid of him becoming dependent on me and of me losing my freedom. I suppose I’m also concerned about handling the social stigmas attached to dating someone who has a visible difference in the way he moves and talks. Intellectually I know it is what's inside someone that counts (I’m attracted to him and he has a great sense of humor)...but I still have some prejudices. What are some ways for me to handle my own prejudices as well as social stigmas so that I can just date him like anybody else without a disability? And if we become sexually involved, what types of issues would I need to be aware of beforehand?

I’m a quadriplegic...is anal sex safe?

I am a man who is disabled (C4-5 quadriplegic) and gay. I have questions and concerns about anal sex without having sensation. Is it safe?

Is a surrogate partner right for me?

I'm 36, and I’ve been a C2-3 quad for the last 15 years. In that time, I've never had a relationship. I feel so incredibly sexually frustrated I can hardly stand it anymore! I would like to meet a woman but I don't have much confidence and I have a poor self body image. I have a colostomy, a mucous trap and an indwelling catheter. Do you think a surrogate partner could help and how do I go about hiring one?

What kind of medication can help a paraplegic have sex?

My 34-year-old boyfriend has been a paraplegic due to spinal cord injury from the waist-down for seven years. He told me he’s able to perform sexually with the aid of medication. What type of medication could he be talking about?