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Better Sex
Women's Sexual Health: Desire

Desire Introduction:
Sexual desire is much more complex than it may appear on the surface. When desire is present, and when it is congruent with a person’s behaviors and values, it is usually accepted without too much thought. When something is amiss, however, things can become complicated. Low sexual desire can have physical causes (such as chronic illness or medication interaction) or psychological causes (such as stress, guilt, or poor body image). Physical desire issues can lead to psychological concerns, and vice versa. This channel deals with these and other topics relating to sexual desire.

Desire Articles:

  • The Weighting Game
  • Too much genital arousal? Persistent Sexual Arousal Syndrome may be the problem!
  • Pros and Cons of Testosterone for Women
  • The Future of Testosterone for Women
  • How To Get Her In The Mood For Sex
  • Love Sick
  • Perfectly Normal. Living and Loving with Low Libido
  • Review of Climatique Arousal Cream
  • Attraction Reaction: How the way you
  • The Pill: An Unhappy Birth-day?
  • The Other Side of Viagra: Turn Off for Some Women?
  • Does Your Date Want to Take It to the Next Level?
  • The Top Ten Reasons for Low Libido
  • Research Findings On Sexually Aggressive Women
  • Erotic Templates: What Turns You On?
  • Sexually Out of Sync

    • Ask a question regarding Women's Sexual Health - Desire

    Answered Women's Sexual Health - Desire Questions:

  • I have been in a relationship for three years now. We recently moved in together and although things are a little tough we are trying to make it work. Both of us say that we love each other too much ....
  • I have never been able to be sexually aroused. Not by thoughts, not by myself, not by another person. What it feels like for me is a slight tickle when something touches on the outside and inside it f ....
  • I am a 24 year old female that has been married for five months. Our relationship has been really rocky due to my lack of desire to have sex with him. I am attracted to him but it seems that I am too ....
  • I am a 22 year old who has been happily married for 2 years. In the past year or so my husband and I have recognized that my libido is nearly gone. I have no children and no real understanding of why ....
  • I am 20 years old and for the past few years I have not been able to become sexually aroused. When I was younger, right before and after puberty, I could get turned on so easily. I wanted to touch mys ....
  • Hello. I know this is a very cliche question but I think my concern is a bit different. Well, I am 16 and for the past few years I have been having a hard time figuring out my orientation. In eighth ....
  • I have performed cunnilingus twice on my girlfriend, each time for the better part of an hour. I am new at this but seem to be enjoying it. My girlfriend is 22 and tells me she is a virgin. I don't ....
  • I am a girl and am 13. I have been masturbating for a couple of months now and it is taking me longer to become aroused while masturbating. What can I do about it?
  • I'm a 17 year old girl and I find that I'm excreting fluids more and more often. I'm not sexually active and don't masturbate. but everytime i'm around my (girl) friend i seem to get excited. all we d ....
  • I am 24 years old. My first sexual experience was in 8th grade, I must have been 13. I was at a birthday party watching a movie amongst other friends when my "boyfriend" of 1 month fingered me under ....
  • I had a total hysterectomy 2 weeks ago and have experienced a very high libido for about 1 week now. Is it safe to stimulate the clitoris to orgasm at this time? I know that vaginal penetration is not ....
  • Hey ok i'm a 17 year old female (i did try to ask this in the female section but it wouldnt let me for some strange reason)anyway, my current bf reffers to my vagina as broken. i dont get horney often ....
  • I HAVE NO DESIRE WHATSOEVER IN SEX. I GAVE BIRTH TO MY SECOND CHILD 11 MONTHS AGO AND EVER SINCE MY SEX DRIVE HAS VANISHED. I LOVE MY HUSBAND VERY MUCH BUT I JUST CANT GET IN THE MOOD. HIS SEX DRIVE I ....
  • Dear Dr. Kat, Would you be so kind please to consult me on the following problem. I have never experienced an orgasm during penetration without me doing clitoral stimulation myself. I have a ve ....
  • I have been having "sexual problems" since I was 16. Problems like: difficulty getting or staying wet during sex, unable to acheive orgasm via intercourse, body shakes when on top and I'd stop aburp ....
  • I met this guy online in October and in about a week we decided to see each other in person. When I saw him in person I was shocked, he did not look what I expected him to look like. He sent me some ....
  • I'm a healthy, well-adjusted 40-year-old woman who loves sex. I have no interest in getting married or of even getting in a long-term relationship. I like that I can have sex when and with whom I w ....
  • Dear Dr. Kat,

    My husband and I are newly married and he was recently sent to the Middle East with a deployment by the Armed Forces. How can we keep the home-fires burning sexually while he's awa ....

  • Dear Dr. Kat,

    I'm in a new relationship and things are absolutely great between my boyfriend and me. We're really compatible in all areas of our life except sex. There just seems to be no sexua ....

  • I have been married for 5 years now, have had 3 kids. For the first year and a half my husband and I where very active in bed. I actually had a higher sex drive than my husband. But shortely after the ....
  • I have tried to have sex twice with my partner in the last few days and I don't get wet and get tight it seems. I have never had this problem until now. What could it be?? Shannon
  • I see all kinds of ways to increase a womans libido but seem to run into a dead end when trying to reduce or eliminate it. My spouse works a lot and is too tired to feel like sex more often than not. ....
  • My husband has a higher sex drive than I do....and when we were younger(I am 22 and he is 21 now and we have a 16 month old son) I was able to keep up with him....but now i cant...any suggestions abou ....
  • Okay i don't know how to say this but i like this guy and he likes me but my problem is every time i talk to him like in school or on the phone i get really horny. And now he did something that he fee ....
  • Is there a women viagra alternative pill out there. if so what are the names and how effective it is.
  • I have been married 7 months but have not been able to feel aroused or been able to have penetrative sex as it is too painful...I was looking forward to the sexual part of my life as I remained a virg ....
  • I am 29 from past 10 years i am mastributing & from past 2 years my penis has no strength, my peniss is loose & my parents Are arranging marriage for me in 10 days, i dont know what to do please help ....
  • I have been married less than a year and have an extremely low sex drive. I can go 3 weeks with out sex and be fine and my husband is climbing the walls. I am extremely frusterated with this, as is he ....
  • Hello, More or less my profile states my problem. It is inability to orgasm during sex, but can achieve orgasm thru masturbation. My partner and I love each other a lot. but we have had stressful t ....
  • Orgasmic disorder and low sex drive
  • Doctor,

    I have some sex problems. I am 28 male and my wife is 26.

    My problem is my wife’s sex drive is very low. She gets mood to have sex rarely (once is 2 months and all).

    And wh ....

  • I am married for almost 4 yrs now. I have a wonderful husband who I dearly love. But for the past year, I seem to lack sexual desire. Lately, I really just don't have the desire to make love with my h ....
  • My wife is 32 yrs old (I'm 44 yrs. old). She is in her sexual prime, but is having problems with her sexual desire and sex drive - there is none. She has been diagnosed as having Hashimoto's disease ....
  • I'm unable to have an orgasm. I also have decreased vaginal lubrication, loss of sensation in the genitals, painful intercourse, orgasmic disorder, low sex drive, lack of sexual desire for 10 years. I ....
  • Hello, I am a 35 year old woman who is involved in a very fulfilling and loving relationship. I have bipolar disorder and take several medications including 450 mg of effexor daily and 1800 mg of Ne ....
  • I am 22 and have been married for 2.5 years to a man that I love SOOO much. Everything is perfect except for our sex life. Basically, I just don't want to have sex anymore. I still have sex with hi ....
  • My wife is 30, and seams to have lost interest in having intercourse, being intimate, not even liking to cuddle in bed. I am 39. Sex is becoming less frequent - once per month now. My wife is a ver ....
  • 1. is there anything to take to increase libido and vaginal lubrication? 2. I would like to take a natural breast enhancer but don't know if it will increase risk for more breast cysts or increase bre ....
  • my problem is that me and my girlfriend has been having sex occasionally before and now she just suddenly feels that she do not want to have it any more.I feel bad as there is a crave for it.Although ....
  • I am 22 married with a one year old son.i have been with my now husband for 6 years and our sex life was great. when i got preganent with my son I knew my sex drive was down, But now its like I don't ....
  • I have two problems. 1. Nervous and scared and lack of sexual desire. 2. feeling unsexy. I have been married for 10 months. Both my husband and I were virgins before we got married. One month aft ....
  • I am 20 years old and have been in a sexual relationship with the same man for the past 2 years. In the past year I have noticed much more pain with intercourse, and I dont lubricate properly. I ....
  • I have been married for 9 months, and my wife and I have been together for almost 5 years in total (I am 24 and she is 23). When my wife and I met, we were always "fooling around" and this lasted for ....
  • I am a 35-year-old female who has stopped experiencing any sexual desire. I started taking oral contraceptives 2 years ago and my libido gradually went away during that time. I have never experienced ....
  • My wife and I have been married for 8 years now, with two children ages 6 & 7. It seems after our kids been born, my wife has lost her sex drive. I am wanting to have sex with her everyday if we c ....
  • I have no sex drive any more and don't feel sexual even though I have a fantstic partner who I love very much
  • I have been with my g'f for over 2 years now. In those two years she has let me make love to her twice and she has touched me once. Is there anything that we can do to help her in her desire for sex ....
  • I am 23 yrs old. I've been married for 2 yrs., and currently 10 weeks pregnant. Almost eversince I new about my pregnancy, I lost my sex drive. I the last 1-2 weeks I've have some but every time I'm ....
  • My wife admits to a low sexual desire. We have been married for 10 years. Our first years of marriage was great but sex has decreased considerably. I usually have to initiate things and that makes me ....
  • My wife says she has totally lost her sex drive (she suffers from Hashimoto's syndrom). She says that having sex is uncomfortable. I have a healthy libido and strongly desire both the emotional and p ....
  • About a week ago, I started Birth Control LO/OVRAL-28 pills. I have gotten past initial cramps and mood swings, but now I have noticed a problem sexually. I have no problem getting wet initially, bu ....
  • I am 24 years old and have been married for one year.For the last six months or so, I have had absolutely no interest in sex or sexual activity, and it is starting to cause a lot of problems in my mar ....
  • Hello Susan, First of all lets introduce: I'm 32, i've been married for 7 years and I have 3 children. I had quite a happy marriage with my first husband and we had a normal sexual life and we mad ....
  • I'm divorced,42 yrs. old with 2 kids. During my marriage I had great sex with my husband, with whom I shared several dreams and fantasies about being with another woman. He was always supporting and e ....
  • I have not had a sex drive for several years and in the last few weeks I have had an intense, constant desire to masterbate or have sex. This is not a normal feeling for me and it is disrupting my dai ....
  • I have a lack of desire with my husband whom I;ve been married to for 17 years. But I am confused because I have constant fantasies about women and I have for as long as I can remember. I had an exp ....
  • I stumbled upon your bio as a "referral" from an "autism" search. I am 21 years old and have been diagnosed with Aspergers since 1996. I just wanted to say hi and how wonderful it is to see that a ....
  • Has any of your books ever been translated into DUTCH? My husband doesn't understand why I am so tense and anti-sexual, but I do. He wants and needs information but his English is not sufficient to re ....
  • I suffer from low libido, there is no reason that I feel this way, I just never feel like sex. I love my boyfriend very much and we have been together for 3yrs. What can I do to increase my libido? I ....
  • Is it possible that i was sexually abused as a child and have no recollection of it? I am 27 years old and have always had painful intercourse. I have been asked in the past by nurse practitioners if ....
  • I am married since 1986, but my husband always abroad he stay with me about one month yearly, he wants to do love evryday and if he can twice daily, we loved each other, but he always tell me that I a ....
  • Hello, I have a question concerning my orgasms and birth conrol pills. For the past few months, it has been a lot harder for me to reach orgasm and the ones that I do have are very small ones. Somet ....
  • Recently, I watched a program on TV -The Early Show- and there was a discussion about something that you could take to increase your sexual desire. I did not catch the whole conversation, but one of t ....
  • Me and my Husband have been married for 2 years, and my daughter is almost 2. Ever since my daughter has been born I have lost all of my sex drive. I love my partner with all of my heart but I am just ....
  • I think I have several symptoms of low estrogen and possibly testosterone levels though I am still having regular periods. My doctor said he could test estrogen and testosterone levels but they ar ....
  • i'm not interested in sex with my husband anymore, i don't have any desire for it and i do it just for the sake that he's my husband and i have to do it..no feelings at all and no sensation, i even fe ....
  • I'm 31 years old, female and I'm married. I have a problem that is causing me lots of anguish. I have no desire for sex at all. My husband is very attractive. I've been feeling this way after ab ....
  • I've been married for the last 10 yrs. Our marriage was great and our sex lives were great also. But the last 4 yrs it’s all going down hill. I love my husband we had an open relationship, which was ....
  • I am 17 and I don't know if you can help, but for some reason I don't seem to enjoy sex. I have had some problems in the past (the guy I lost my virginity too was abusive and our relationship ended in ....
  • I am not sure if my problem is medical or sexual but no one seems to have any idea how to help so I thought a miracle may happen here and you may know the answer. Can a time come in a womans life when ....
  • I am a 29 year old female. I have been married for 6 years and 9 months, and in the past year and a half or so my sex drive has almost completely vanished. My husband and I used to have sex 2-3 times ....
  • I have been dating my girlfriend now for over a year now and we both need an answer to a pressing concern. I have an extremely high sex drive, bordering on compulsive and I react negatively when my pa ....
  • Hi Aline, I'm not sure if you are the right person to ask, or even if I'm asking the right question, but I have been dating my girlfriend now for over a year now and we both need an answer to a pre ....
  • My wife was sexually abused as a child by her brother for a number of years. She has undergone therapy and is doing quite well. She has never been very sexual and i was told by the therapist that is w ....
  • Side effects of high blood pressure meds, specifically Hytrin, have caused my partner to have feelings of asexuality and literally no sexual desire whatsoever. While my partner is perfectly willing t ....
  • I just had a baby about 16 weeks ago. From the time I became pregnant I just don't want anything to do with my husband when it comes to sex. The delivery was easy. And I tried to get pregnant becau ....
  • I am a 28 year old female who had a baby almost a year ago. Since I gave birth I lost sexual desire. Before the baby I had desire often and my husband and I had a healthy sex life now I have none, zip ....
  • My wife and I are looking for a female doctor in the Houston area who can address the above highlighted problems (total absence of libido). The doctors she's talked to are clueless when it comes to t ....
  • I am dating a man of 2yrs now and we have 1 child toghter and another on the way this April. About 6 months ago I found out i had trichmonia?(std). The doctors gave me Flaygl. I want to know if this ....
  • I’ve been forced to initiate sex for the last five years or so. My wife manages to muster up the energy to participate when I ask her to – about once a month. Lately, my erections haven’t been v ....
  • I have gradually lost feeling in my genitals. I suffer from depression but I am questioning the fact that I may have Asperger's Syndrome. I have three childern who look to all have the same symptoms ....
  • No sexual desire. I am 24 years old and have been with my boyfriend for 8 years. I have no sexual desire. When we do have sex by body "usually" complies but there are times when I physically am not re ....
  • My fiance has recently lost all interest in sex. She used to be quite the opposite and we had a fairly active sex life. My question is: Is this normal for someone to go through this? I totall ....
  • I had an autologus bone marrow transplant for non-hodgkins lymphoma in 1991 I am taking an estradiol patch 0.1mg per day. iam also taking syntheroid at low doses i cannot feel sexual excitement and ....
  • I am 22 years old. I have been married for 4 months. I am currently battleing depression. I have been dealing with depression for 3 years. I was taking 20 mg of prozac every day. During this time ....
  • I fear that a man I have fallen in love with may in fact be a masochist. As the relationship progressed, there have been subtle hints that lead me to believe this. I also feel that he struggles with t ....
  • I'm taking Estratest 1.25/2.5 and Medroxyprogesterone - I have little or no sexual drive. Could I use a testostorne cream too? My husband is about ready to leave, he says I never want to have sex & ....
  • my partener has low sex drive and i have high or normal his sex drive has gone less and less for the last three years we have been together 6 years please help i get upset as i fell he dosnt love me h ....
  • How is the vagina lubricated? I've searched all of the online libraries, and I have only found general information. Help!
  • I am 16 and I have never had an orgasm. About a year ago, I started taking the antidepressant Paxil. After about 6 months of taking this, I stopped feeling the sensations of getting aroused. I still ....
  • I am a 33 year old female with a decreased sexual drive. I am interested in finding a natural remedy with herbs or vitamins that will increase my sexual desire. Can you recommend any product or prod ....
  • i want to know what i can do to "get in the mood" when my husband is. I fantasize and masterbait but when he's ready i'm not, never, i love him very much but it just is not there, this has also happen ....
  • This is a strange thing for me, but lately, with my boyfriend of two years, the sex has been painful and annoying. I feel like I want to have sex with him a lot, but when he wants to I am disgusted b ....
  • We have a very beautiful and well-grounded relationship in all aspects, but sex. My girlfriend says that she wants to be with me but there is something unknown that is obstructing our sexual life. ....
  • My girlfriend and myself have been involven in a serious relationship for close to four years now. We are both 20 years old and love each other very much. For the past two years her desire to have s ....
  • I DON'T FEEL SEXUAL DESIRE TOWARDS MY BOYFRIEND.
  • I just got married in June, and things have been well, but my husband has a much higher sex drive than myself. I think he would love to have sex twice a day. I'm a twice a month sort of person. This h ....
  • I am a female in my twenties. Skin around my clitoris and my vagina peels off quickly after sexual contact. I seem to get swollen and sex becomes painful and I try to avoid it as much as possilbe. I ....
  • Hey who are you doing? I have a problem with my boyfriend because he's wanting to have sex a lot (he said he's addicted to it) and I don't want to have sex right now, even though I am very much at ....
  • I am 28 years old and have been with my husband for over 7 years and have been married for 3 years. I am afraid that I am not physically attracted to my husband anymore. However, I still love him de ....
  • Gradual loss of vaginal lubrication, lack of pleasurable sensation in clitoral area, lack of sexual desire
  • My main concern is for myself although my wife is the cause of my questions. My wife has CP and a history of being molested as a child. Her sex drive when we first met (before we were married) was to ....
  • I am a 58-year-old male with post-polio syndrome and have been married for 31 years. Although I have increased limb weakness, general fatigue and joint pain, I have a healthy sex dri ....
  • I am a 52-year-old woman with multiple sclerosis. Before the onset of MS five years ago, my husband and I made love about once a week and I always had an orgasm. But the more disabled I get the ....
  • Sex has become close to non-existent due to my wife's chronic pain associated with fibromyalgia. What suggestions do you have for us?
  • Sex has become close to non-existent due to my wife's chronic pain associated with fibromyalgia. What suggestions do you have for us?
  • The most satisfactory sexual experiences I've had are with other people with disabilities. That's fine, but how can I convince potential nondisabled partners that I have a libido and a responsiv ....
  • My husband and I had a baby nine months ago and our relationship seems to be on a down hill slide. We have had sex no more t ....
  • I am a 41 yr. old female that has a low libido. My gyno put me on testosterone cream, and ran several tests, but the cream did not work. However, my ....
  • I need to talk to someone about my wife's and my problems. they are issues that are intimate and I need help solving ....
  • My wife and I have been married for two years and only had sex after getting married. The problem is that my wife' ....
  • I am a woman of 34 years old and my husband is 44. We are married for 8 years and we have 2 children. My problem i ....
  • Frigid wife of 22yrs never had big O. Doesn't like any foreplay. No oral sex. Can't touch Breasts. Can't lick,kiss or anythi ....
  • I am a 26 yr old female, and my question pertains to the lack of sexual desire. I have seen many Q & A's in here about sexua ....
  • I was watching the news the other night and they referred the viewers to this website. They did a piece on sexual dysfunctio ....
  • I am desperately seeking advice on low testosterone. I gave birth 18 months ago I have lost my sex drive completely My gyn ....
  • I'm tying to fine some information on A-Sexuality...I believe my husband is. Am I using the right term here "A-Sexuality" meaning ....
  • After our fourth child, my wife stopped being interested in sex. She has a history of having been sexually abused as a chi ....
  • I'm 21 year old, and I've been in a committed relationship for a year and a half. We are having problems sexually, and I c ....
  • My wife and I have been married for 21 years. The past four months my wife says she has lost her sexual desire, ....
  • I am a 22 years old. My wife and I have been married for less than two years. She recently began taking antidepr ....
  • I have a problem with getting sexually aroused that has been going on for a long time and gotten worse over the last ....
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